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The Toupee Stealing Monkey (Nasher)


I went to the zoo one day and there was Eddy Kent
He was chasing a monkey and he seemed like he was hell bent.

I asked him what was going on and why he chases the monkey down
"The damn buggar was taunting me, he really made me frown."

Up and over the fence, I saw Eddy go
He chased that monkey everywhere, running to and fro.

"I tried to give the buggar a banana," he said
And finished with, "Then he smacked me in the forehead."

"Didn't he take the banana?" I replied.
"Yes, but there was something else he eyed."

I saw something from the corner of my eye, that really made me laugh
Seeing these two chase eachother around, was so very daft.

The monkey stole Eddy's toupee, he had set it on his head
Poor Eddy, didn't know what to do, he was seriously mislead.

"I'm gunna get the daft buggar, e'en if it takes me all night
I won't leave here without my toupee, he ain't gunna win this fight."

"Maybe after you get your toupee back, you can get them to put up a sign,
Saying, 'This monkey will steal your toupee, so please, stand in line'."

"Oh, buggar off Cynthia, I want my toupee back,
Just keep laughing at me, I'll come over there and give YOU a smack!"

"I'd like to see ya try it, ya bald headed little freak
The way you're chasing that monkey, you look rather weak."

Eddy wasn't paying attention, he tripped and landed on his face
The monkey turned and laughed at him and knew he couldn't be outraced.

The monkey taunted Eddy, by placing the toupee on his own head
Eddy was bothered by the sight, his face turned blood-red.

He went into the monkey's cage and pinned him to the fence
Eddy got his toupee back and that ended the day's suspence.

Copyright Cynthia Jones
Oct.19/2005

I wrote this for a friend of mine on another poetry site, to give him a lugh. Well..... it worked. LOL







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