The fire is glowing; I'm here on the couch
I'm in deep trouble; my wife is a grouch
She stood at the doorway, she waited for me
I never did notice, I never did see
Up there above her, mistletoe hung
I walked right on past her; she stuck out her tongue
I gave her my hand and said how was your day
I got my playstation and proceeded to play
If looks could kill, I'd be dead now
But men they respect me, I give them a bow
I am the master in my domain
Marvin the Great is my true name
I get what I want and I want what I get
My friends they all laugh then take all their bets
Will he be living when day becomes night
She will not hurt me on Christmas eve night
But I take no chances I won't go to sleep
I won't close my eyes I won't count the sheep
Then all of a sudden I heard a loud crash
Is it a cat getting into the trash
I thought I heard footsteps up on the roof
I heard my dog Rex go woof, woof, woof
Then there was silence all through the house
I thought I'd get up and check on my spouse
I need to be careful I cannot surprise
She may just shoot me between the eyes
I walk down the hallway in my bare feet
I was so nervous I felt my heart beat
I opened the door much to my surprise
There was old Santa in bed with my wife
Can you imagine the anger I felt
This was some hand that I was just dealt
But I stayed calm and went up to him
I gave him a smile he gave me a grin
You've been so good thanks for your wife
You are now set for the rest of your life
Now that's what I call a generous guy
I'll never lack what money can buy
I went back to sleep and had a great dream
I was so happy I had everything
When Christmas morn came my wife was not home
He took her away and made her his own
I was surprised for under the tree
Was what I really wanted, a Playstation 3
That day was the best I played all day long
I was so happy I sang Christmas songs
My friends they all love me life's not the same
Since I lost my wife but got my new playstation game
