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Dirty Nails, And Itchy Bums…


What can I say!!  Shock and horror!!
This was featured on BBC Radio's website!!

(I dare not tell who I write about)!!!

They have dirty nails and suck their thumbs,
Kids with worms, who scratch their bums!
In the muck they dig and play!
Not caring about hygiene, just enjoying their day!

They mess with this, muck about!
Nails full of muck, the germs are out!
Grimy hands, fingers black as mud!
But still they play in muck, as any kid would!

But they itch their bum's, and cry and complain!
While poor mum's crying; ‘Oh no! Not again!'
So off to the doctor they run, in a hurry!
The kid's got worms; they're all in a flurry!

‘I need the medicine! Right away!
Cos the kid's got worms, and it's not ok!'
The doctor smiles, as doctors do!
Give you medication, to treat the kids and you!

But the kids don't care; they are full of fun,
All they know is; they've got an itchy bum!
‘Oh woe is me!'  One mum shouts out!
‘I can't stand worms, there aint no doubt!!!!

So she screams to the doctor; ‘What do I do!
We've never had them before, I aint got a clue!'
So the medicine is given, oh what relief to know,
That the worms are history and about to go!

One mum is hysterical; she can't cope, no way!
‘Get them outa me bum!' She'll scream all day!
She won't go the loo, case a worm pops out!
Oh yes, she's terrified, aint no doubt!

‘Oh hell, oh tell me; cos I don't have a clue!
I'm worm-a-phobic and don't know what to do!
I wash all day, and wipe and scrub!
Aint no way my kids ever have a grub!

Cos they wash their hands, over and again!
They don't want worms, cos they are a pain!
So you tell them to sop sucking on their thumb,
Or else the worms will itch your bum!

But the kids don't care, and they tell us true;
‘Its ok mum, other kids have got them too!'
Oh blimey, oh riley, what can you do!
Cos they're as rife as hell – didn't have a clue!

You're in a panic, you're in a sweat!
Scared stiff to know it's something you get!
So you lay in the dark of night, alone in your bed,
Scared to think, scared to scratch your head!

Cos not only worms are shooting round the schools,
But so are nits – and there aint no rules!
They aint fussy, any head will do!
 But if you don't want nits, you know what to do!

Get to the hairdresser and shave that head!
And pretty soon them nits will be dead!
The worms are a problem, don't know what to do!
She's really phobic!  Well you would be to!

So every day after school, there she'll be;
De-nitting and de-worming, every night after tea!
Scrubbing at this, and rubbing at that!  
Zapping them hard, and knocking them flat!

While little fingers have dirty nails, and  itchy bums!







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