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What is this write actually?


This writing is kind of experiment
I'm open more than I even want
But I'm scared that this way
I can lost you forever
Even before I really get you
My Love, but
If I don't I'll be sure
That it is you
And you will be sure of this too
If you wont be scared of my thoughts
And my love to you
Then you can be this man
Who would stay with me for good
If you only listen this
What I have to say to you

But now you know
That if you wont be a good lover
I can even tell this to another
Is it not terrible to you?
I hope you are strong enough
To not care of this too much
I hope that you are
Really open mind
And you know
That I like this risk
A little
So, now I can lost
My job, my husband
And the worst - you too
But what can I get?
Real love and my self
So, I think it is worth
Besides I like this talk
I love to feel the contact
With you and with the world too
I think that it is even the way of living
I'm just not sure yet
I could make money of it
I never tried to sell my self
And these thoughts I have
And if anybody is interested
This kind of dream to get
Maybe it is the best what I could do
But I'm not sure I'm good seller at all
And is it easy to handle all of my dreams
To live from this but only with you
It is just another dream I have
Or it could be truth
Who knows?

You know that I don't need
The real work to live
I prefer to have
This free time to think
To realize my self
I don't need to be
The business woman at all
I would write and paint
And that's all I could do
But I'm not sure
If I'm able to get by this
So, I try to be a scientist
But I don't feel this
And I don't think so
I could be good engineer at all
I don't like to built the road
I prefer to write about my Love
And measuring this ground
Is not so interesting as your heart
I feel you inside my soul
And all I want is
Talk to you about this
What my heart whisper to me
And that's all my life I think
But what if inspiration will hits
After we meet?
Probably I'll find something else
To live
I don't know why
But everything you do now
Looks for me very attractive
So, maybe I'll try to work with you?
Will You take me to your crew?
I don't know
I think I did everything wrong
To be with you
My Love, but maybe not?
You are still silent
So, I don't know
But this is exciting too
So, everything I can do
Is just go to you and check
Someday
Because you can't speak
From this time I opened my heart
To you
You didn't say yes
You didn't say no
What should I think about this?
I don't know
But you know that I believe
At you still
So, I need to go
Just wait for me, my Love
But what if you are just scared of me?
What I'll do then?
I don't know
I'll try to understand this
I'll try to built my world again
And still live some how
But this is what I'm afraid about
The most right now

Written by Anna Cellmer







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