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 Self Truths

Why don't you want me?

say you love me thats all i ask
because i thought you did
now i guess i was wrong
you have seen the monster in me
you have tamed that very monster
yet you don't want to be it's master
you've learned my secrets
when i say i'm okay
you see through my lies
you see the pain in my eyes
you know that i'm scared inside
thats why i hide
i found out that the more you give
the more painfully you're hurt
you said i only wanted sex
but i only wanted to have the person you are
i'm not a pervert like other guys
i love you for who you are inside
but you wont let me in you're heart
you push me away, you act like you dont know me
you find a way to scare me off
first you cut your wrists
then i told you to stop
you didnt think i cared but
then i swore to follow you
to the pits of hell and back again
you said dont do this
i said you see that road you're on
i paved that road when i went to hell
and now i'm back and i'm paving it again
then you tried suicide but it didnt work
i thought that you were afraid of what you felt
but i think i was wrong once again
you always surprise me with something
whether it be a smile or a hug
a new cut on the wrist or
you just surprise me and say
that you love me more than you can explain
i tell you dont try to explain in words just show me actions
i tell you to trust you're heart
do what feels right inside you
let me in to the life you call hell
and ill show you mine
then you can try to say you're in a living hell
but you're not i am

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