Does it tickle?
Isn't it itchy?
What on earth is she talking about?
Has the woman really gone crazy?
She's seen headlines on the Internet
A competition being held
In the glorious resort of Brighton
Where many a mad person dwelled!
The world and its men have come forward
To show off their peculiar attributes
Have I made myself clear yet?
Their lower face is from where it shoots!
Weird Beard and Moustache Contest
Oh, I only wish I were there
To run my fingers through their whiskers
Ask them if they wouldn't rather go bare!
One man has grown his down to his belly button
Another one's handlebars he has greased
The one who's wearing a short goatee came last
And he certainly wasn't all that pleased!
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