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Live with chronic pain
That leaves me angrily insane
Sometimes carrying laundry up the stairs kills me
I scream "I hate my life"---while inside to God I plea

To let me go on functionally
Since 1999, had this reality
That my back, buttock, and leg are going to hurt
Take the aides that keep you alive and do not flirt

With the idea of ending it
There is a place for me in God where I do fit
And if I pray another moment with his will
I'll take another step, ignore the pain I feel

That stuns me physically then gets my mind
All from that ache in my behind
That's driving that nerve root crazy
Oh pain that leads the rest of me to lazy

When it hurts, I have to change positions
For 8 years, still adapting to the conditions
That I must control pain before it controls me
Or I won't be living functionally

In this little poet world here on my couch
Where I sit and write away that grouch
That boils up in me when pain is what I feel
Where I thank God for my doctor whom I have faith he knows it's real.

9/9/2007 1750 cj

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