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Why don't they do as they are told to do?
Why won't they sit when they are asked?
Why do they always misbehave when they are out?
I'm exhausted with taking him to task!

I throw a stick and seldom can he find it,
Darting through bushes and getting lost.
Jumping upon people with muddy feet
And can clearly see I'm getting cross!

While I'm eating he nips at my ankles,
I find it infuriating to say the least,
And when he sees another of his breed,
I think the commotion will never cease!

Granted, there is one time that he does adore,
A pampered session having a shampoo and brush.
And when he spots the ladies,
He sure like's gazing at their tush!

If he has an illness he is quite reticent and
Doesn't take kindly to being checked over,
Though he does like having his tummy rubbed
And always yelps out after his friend called Rover!

He insists on sleeping on my bed all night,
Hogging the covers and shoving me to the side.
He thinks it's funny when he hides my slippers,
I've tried to stop him : I really have tried!

Yes, training sessions are all I can think of now,
Things have gone far beyond the pale.
Either that or an advert in the local newspaper,
"One boyfriend, slightly tarnished, offer for sale!!"

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