Beautiful Disaster

Giving In vs Giving Up

They say to give in
But I'd rather give up
I don't want sympathy
I can't cure this apathy
You want me to participate
Well don't anticipate
I don't plan to reciprocate
They say just don't make waves
Don't ask questions
Don't go against the spoken word
Pretend to pay attention
Act sweet
Look nice
Smile a lot
Basically...
Don't be yourself
Don't learn anything
Internalize your problems
Be fake
I'm sorry
But I'm a wave maker
I challenge people
To make sure they know
I need to be shown
I refuse to be fake
I can't contain my thoughts
I yearn to be intrigued
Engaged
Interested in learning
But not this time
I'm on the outside looking in
Taking a back seat
To my life
Seeing the unbearable strife
And not being able to tackle it
No chance of change
I'm too stubborn to give in
To this unspoken sin
Please don't ask me
To change
This is my fight
No one can
Fight for me
I won't give in
But I won't give up
I will strive to
Survive and to thrive
I may struggle to stay alive
And I may lose my life
But I'd rather give up
Before giving in.




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