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I Was Born In Liverpool…


I was born in Liverpool down near the dock,
We didn't have no carpets, not even a clock!
The floor was of wood, and not laminate you know!
Cos way back then, it was all we had on show!

No blankets on the bed, nowt to keep us warm,
Just old coats thrown over us, and the old odd moth ball!
We never wore PJ's, cos we didn't know about those,
We just slept in our underwear; and had socks on our toes.

We didn't have no lights, not way back then; oh no!
Just candles, or torches, and the odd moonlight glow!
Electricity was rare, it was usually off!
Except of course, unless you were a Liverpool toff!

We had power cuts all over the place one time,
And we had to adhere to the rules, or face a fine!
Curtains were closed, well, that's if you had any!
Let's face it; we sold everything for a penny!

And one time we were playing up mums stairs,
We locked me bro' in the wardrobe, he had agoraphobic fears!
As we latched the door closed, the lights went out!
We legged it downstairs, but heard me bro' shout!

Mum went ballistic; she belted us round the ears!
Cos our bro was a wimp, with his agoraphobic fears!
Then to add fuel to the fire, it began to thunder!
Then the lightening hit, and threw us asunder!

We hid in the living room under the settee,
That's me and me bro, and the other bro' you see!
Then the lights came on again, oh but we were glad,
Cos we were all terrified with the scare we'd just had!

Then we'd go to bed early, all washed behind the ears,
No moaning or winging, we dare not show tears!
Up we would go, to our bedroom's we'd creep…
Were all things were simple, as we slumbered in sleep!

Next morning in winter, of course this is true;
We had no heating, just coal fires had to do!
So up we would get and sit round the fire,
But it wasn't lit, oh but life was in the mire!

Off to school we would go, at lightening speed,
With a flea in our ears to behave and do a good deed!
But as soon as we got there, the trouble started,
Cos I'd belt the lads so their games were thwarted!

Oh but I was a good lass, I really was; that's true!
The best girl footballer in Liverpool, a Red, not a Blue!!
So next time you're in Liverpool, down by the dock,
Remember to look to the Liver Birds, it's a clock!

That's how we knew the time, cos we didn't have a clue,
With no watch or clock, you're be confused too!
So Liverpool, Liverpool, down by the Mersey river,
Don't stand there too long, cos it will make you shiver!

Chorus...

I was born in Liverpool down near the dock...
Me religion is Catholic, occupation hard-knock!
Stealing from lorries...ta, da, da, da...

Etc;

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