Beautiful Disaster

Who I am

I often find myself
Wishing that I wasn't
Who I've become.  
Completely broken
With feelings

I keep trying to
Build myself back up
To who I used to be
But I know
That girl is no longer
With in me.

I know I'm not
What they expected
Me to be
And it seems
I will never get them
To see the real me.

I've changed
From the little girl
They used to know
Jeans and a T-shirt
Instead of cute outfits
With the matching bow

Do I apologize
For finding
My own way
Or are they the ones
That should have
Something to say

I wish I felt
That who I was
Was enough for them
But instead I feel
As if I have to change
Who I am

I try so hard
To make them understand
The person inside

But it seems as if
They will never know
No matter how I tried.

The world tells me
I will never get anywhere
If I don't have the looks
But my heart tells me
I won't be anything
Unless I have the books

The world says
Big isn't beautiful
And skinny is in
But I know I would rather
Be compassionate
Then be thin

And I just wish
That I could make them
Understand and see
That I might not be
Perfect to the world
But I'm perfect for me

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