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The Mutant Syndrome!!!


It's official! I'm a mutant!
It was disclosed to me the other day!
Yep, body is a very unique one!!
But I guess that's really ok!!

You see I have this syndrome,
But it answered some questions we had!
And that's because I'm a mutant!!!
Well golly me, ain't that pretty sad?

You see, I get these tumours,
Heck knew why, but now we know!
Its cos I've got this genetic thing!
‘Gardners Syndrome' and tumours grow!

So five tumours in all I've had!
Oh yes, cos I'm really unique you see!
But that's ok, cos I'm knackered anyway,
So it goes with the rest of my body!

Now these tumours are really rare!!
That's what they told me true!!
‘Very rare world-wide!!' They said!
Well at least now we have a clue!

Cos we didn't know why you know!
Why I'm on my 5th flipping tumour!
At the end of the day, it don't matter!
Cos I'm still here with my humour!!!!

But I'm not a ninja turtle mutant!!
Cos they kick really hard and fast too!
And my spine is breaking all over,
Honestly, it is, that's true!!

Yep, it's breaking up all the time!
Bits snap off here and there!
Prolapsed disc, and another fracture!
But I'm getting use to it! I guess its fair!

It's just the pain that goes with it!
I wouldn't mind it if it didn't hurt!
But hurt it does, when I walk I'm bent!
And it's, ‘ouch, and oooohs,' that I blurt!

But I guess my wheelchair helps!
Good job I've got that too!
But hey, I'm getting a new one!!
All flashy green and brand-new!

So hey, I'm ok with all of that!
Cos I'm a unique mutant, its true!
And if you had 5 tumours like me!
Then you'd be a mutant too!

…But hey, that would mean…
…I'm no more unique…
So you cant have any!!!

;o)

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