I can't explain the spark
You see before you…
But I sure as hell am going to try…
I am not sure of the source of its
Origin
Time itself
The universe itself
Who knows
Not even I know
But I'm going to give it a go…
Where's the first spark of memory?
In the car,
Mother in front
Me in the back
Dad with my brother in the store
The sweltering heat
Baking the box we were sitting in
His punishment
And my brother held for emotional ransom.
“When he gets back I'm going to give him a piece of my mind!” I spoke forcefully as much as a child could muster.
My mother whipped around so fast it frightened me.
“You'll never stand up to him.
If you do he'll get mad enough
To leave us,
And leave nan and pop
And then they'll loose their pension,
So you'll never say a word to him.”
Then the spark appeared.
A thought
A passion
A promise…
To do well in school
So I could get my mother
Away from the bastard.
Then the second spark came,
When I was sixteen
And I met the divine
My beloved of beloveds
Face to face in the streets
Of an imaginary Jerusalem
And the man
The legend
Looked at me in a disembodied form
Up in a tree
And knowingness flooded me.
I would never be alone again
I would be loved forever
And not in the way the church
Approved of.
Spark upon spark
These are but descriptions
Of the cracking of two rocks
And no more
But passion for my beloved humanity
Feeds the flames
For this drive
To be altruistic
In a way that feels
Inhuman,
Cause no one
Is believed to be that good,
But I think they are
And I will hold that
Hope
That place
That space
No matter what the
Bitter world cries
To the contrary
I know that deep within
No one wishes
The dreams of children to die.
I know that they simply wish
To save me from what they'
Believe to be the bitter truth:
“The world is cruel.
Unjust.
Unfair.”
But the reverse is true
I am here to save
Myself.
I am here to save
The greater part of myself,
That's in you…
The parts that gave up
The parts that became cruel
Because it was a way to survive…
I am altruistic
I am idealistic
And I am here
To remind you
Me
The world
It really can be a better place
If we can just connect.
