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Don't get me wrong, I really adore Christmas; the image of festive spirit makes me glad.

Much thought going in to buying someone a present and all the frivolity to be had.

What I don't enjoy is all down to Santa and the mess he creates sure makes me mad.

Ok, so getting down chimneys can't be that easy, feet first or head first, I wouldn't know.

And does he throw the sack full of toys he has in tow?

Or does he tell Rudolph to fling it down when he shouts “GO”?

Either way, he certainly makes a state of my fireplace: where embers have turned to dust.

The mantle has stockings with names on: oh, an absolute must.

Even tiny children have got that matter sussed!

But those sooty footprints are a real giveaway!

From the fireplace to the tree they go!

And stealthy they creep to the side of the bed!

He's kissing Mummy……….ho ho ho!!

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