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Outside Looking In
The years continue to tumble past, yet so much is unchanged;
I am almost fifty seven years old now, not much is rearranged.
I am still that little boy looking in my back porch screen door,
Not only wishing to come inside, but I was wanting so much more.
My school daze blur into oblivion as I had to fit into someone's mold;
Teachers instructing me about conformity, never should I be bold.
Becoming a shallow shell of unreality, this puppet becomes me;
Yet, I'm on the outside looking in, desiring nothing but to be free.
To become one of the promised ones, a child with that golden star;
I tried to meet their standards, yet from the reality I traveled far.
Trying to be became a prison cell, locking me even farther away;
From the outside looking in as I played, even farther every day.
I wanted to be one of the in-crowd so much, that I emptied myself,
I had some friends and acquaintances; but in reality, no eternal wealth.
Becoming a mere chameleon, as I blended in with my surroundings;
Still on the outside looking in, this truth became so resounding.
I began to allow the me that was within to be seen, no longer a toy;
That gulf of separation widened quickly, as I became a lonely boy.
Yet, destiny has dealt with me about my past in this present day;
I spend my time on the outside looking in, but I never lost my way.
14Apr09
Poetry Ad-Free Upgrades
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