To my family who are not there for me,
What is the meaning of family.
No closeness or bond, belonging or belong,
What do you care, a cold hearted glare.
365 days, 12 months in the year,
but what do you care when I shed a tear.
Months and days, seconds and hours,
If I were in my grave would you bring me flowers.
Would you shed a tear and regret words not spoken,
Would you unburden your soul or use a sentiment token.
Unemotive, cold, there's no offer of care,
No support and warmth, just a cold hearted glare.
I watch other families in their hour of need,
A life support of love to each other they feed.
Shared emotions of happiness, love and joy,
Feelings of pride whether girl or boy.
But to exist in a family that just don't care,
Achievements are met with jealousy, disinterest, or the 'whatever' glare.
It fills me with disappointment, sadness and pain,
Why are we not like other families, why are we not the same.
There is a sense of irrelevance, strangers they become,
I am faceless and silent in this family so numb.
I have tried to be heard and to inject some life,
but their lack of interest fills me with misery and strife.
So consuming and obsessed about their own miserable lives,
On rare occasions they contact me its usually for advice.
How am I , is left unanswered, as what did they really care,
Survival of the fittest is all they share.
Forgiving, I make excuses, for they know not what they do,
Making me question who I am, who are you.
I hear my heart beating, the breaths that I take,
as I question my reason for living or the difference it makes.
Its a lonely existence in a family that doesn't care,
Regardless of the size and the nature of the stare.
So again, I pose the question,
What is the meaning of family,
A social construction of fake reality.
Thoughts are the drivers of perceptions and beliefs,
The differences between feelings of happiness and grief.
So what does it mean when you think your family doesn't care,
The reality your left with is the cold hearted glare.
Cognitions are omissions but what story do they tell,
Only you can determine if its happiness or hell.