Yes I do remember my Father
On no special day
I assume he is shoveling coal for the devil
The last time I saw him alive
I was holding shotgun and pulled the trigger
Dumb me I put rifle bullets in it
Sis crying hysterically afraid
Running handed me a loaded pistol
But the man who came in proclaiming,
"I well beat you within an inch of your life."
I knew he meant it.
Several times Mom was in the emergency room
Once I rode beside her in a coma
I had as a boy decided to challenge him as a man
I was bigger stronger offered to put the pistol down
But the brave man ran like the coward I knew he was
Years later the phone ran and a man said,
"Your Father died and he has no will."
And I asked why are you calling me
I didn't want him alive I surely did not want to bury him
If this seems cold those who know me I am a caring man
Oregon law says if there is no will the eldest son is executor
I have no idea of what I signed away
There were those who said he changed and loved him
I looked up to heaven at Mom and said with whatever
he leaves behind is yours and you can bury him
When the estate is settled we well send your share
As predicted once they had my signature I never heard
from those who said I was a brother and they loved me
An alcoholic, wife and child abuser I know he did one good thing
As a father myself I would never be like "Father Dearest"
*I know I am to get over it. But you know not long ago it was Mother's
day. The Doctor said on her dying days, "Your Mom's cancer was showing signs of
regression but we had to stop the medicine thinning her blood we were giving her as
she is a bleeder. From her broken noses it became impossible to
cauterize the bleeding thinning her blood. Sis when she handed me the gun was shouting
that i should kill the monster that was my Father. She passed out and hit
her head on an iron railing. From that time on she suffered fainting
spells that lead to her many times rushed to the hospital with bleeding.
One time she did not come out of her coma. I blame not the booze or the
addiction but the evil man inside. I grew up squeezing tennis balls to
get strong for the day I ended his torment. For me Father's day celebration
is the day he left.