POETRY IN MOTION
Better out Than in
Better out Than in
I'm a nurse at the doctor's clinic,
A job I've done for years.
The people that I deal with most
Are those with blocked up ears.
Off duty I like modern jazz,
I'm quite good on the sax,
But in the day from 9 to 5
I'm clearing out the wax.
I use a dainty little tool,
I think it's Japanese,
It's quiet and it's gentle
And it does the job with ease.
Not like the thing I used to use,
That took two hands to lift,
A massive metal instrument
That really made stuff shift.
It had a great big plunger
That a pint of water shot
Smack into someone's earhole
And it stunned them on the spot.
The sight of it alone I know
Would frighten one and all.
I bet that you could use that thing
To pebbledash a wall.
It also looked quite similar
To the things they used to make
That you put coloured icing in
To write things on a cake.
I'd put it in a patient's ear
And tell them "This won't hurt"
And just to gain their confidence
I'd give a little squirt
They'd smile and tell me "That's OK".
I always knew, of course,
The smile would very quickly go
When I used all my force.
I'd take a breath then make a plunge
And send forth one big blast.
It would have sent them flying
If they weren't held down fast.
And they would look bewildered,
Cos a drop I never spilt,
They used to leave the surgery
Their heads stuck in a tilt.
But, boy, it always did the trick
And I don't like to knock it
Cos lumps of wax however thick
Would shoot out like a rocket.
And when they got their colour back
And when their ear stopped ringing,
They'd hear the clock tick on the wall
And the birds outside a-singing.
But as I say, the tool today
Is such a different one,
It's gentle, small and and doesn't scare -
And isn't half the fun.
I'm a nurse at the doctor's clinic,
A job I've done for years.
The people that I deal with most
Are those with blocked up ears.
Off duty I like modern jazz,
I'm quite good on the sax,
But in the day from 9 to 5
I'm clearing out the wax.
I use a dainty little tool,
I think it's Japanese,
It's quiet and it's gentle
And it does the job with ease.
Not like the thing I used to use,
That took two hands to lift,
A massive metal instrument
That really made stuff shift.
It had a great big plunger
That a pint of water shot
Smack into someone's earhole
And it stunned them on the spot.
The sight of it alone I know
Would frighten one and all.
I bet that you could use that thing
To pebbledash a wall.
It also looked quite similar
To the things they used to make
That you put coloured icing in
To write things on a cake.
I'd put it in a patient's ear
And tell them "This won't hurt"
And just to gain their confidence
I'd give a little squirt
They'd smile and tell me "That's OK".
I always knew, of course,
The smile would very quickly go
When I used all my force.
I'd take a breath then make a plunge
And send forth one big blast.
It would have sent them flying
If they weren't held down fast.
And they would look bewildered,
Cos a drop I never spilt,
They used to leave the surgery
Their heads stuck in a tilt.
But, boy, it always did the trick
And I don't like to knock it
Cos lumps of wax however thick
Would shoot out like a rocket.
And when they got their colour back
And when their ear stopped ringing,
They'd hear the clock tick on the wall
And the birds outside a-singing.
But as I say, the tool today
Is such a different one,
It's gentle, small and and doesn't scare -
And isn't half the fun.
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Better out Than in
Better out Than in
