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Me And My Indian Wife

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My face has more wrinkles than Johnny Unitas
My body's war-torn from osteo-arthritis
I'm no longer multi-orgasmic.
If I get aroused
it's far from fantastic
Women seem colder
My life's in a manilla folder
My skin's pock marked brown as molass.

I'm older,, but, not wiser
with no fortune to miser
I'm up  over age, 60 plus tax
In a pinch, there's little to flaunt.
I get senior discounts
but, that's not what I want.

My hair has grown thick 
in my ears and my nose.
Phlegm flows freely
from out of my pie hole..
I snort when I wheeze,
Doc, more pain killers please
that's how it is to grow old.

If I could grow young
I'd  go long
I'd be stoked.
They wouldn't say "hey gramps,
where do you think you're going" ?
You wouldn't see me fumbling around
 in a ripped, hospital gown
sporting butt cheeks of cheese to be showing

I'd awaken each day
with a bounce to my step
I'd tap dance at parties,
be nobody's schlep.
Blue ribbons and bow ties
your number one rep.
If I could grow young
and not old.

Lord, with your mercy
please bring me back home
Sidestepping the smells
the blast whistles, alarms
and mind numbing bells.
 The incessant
coughing, sneezing wheezing,
and nose blowing.,
The  telephone's ringing
A  charge nurse keeps singing
But,  none of my family's showing

 Up or down soon my soul 
will be flying
I know all about death
you see, my friends
  are all dying.

Still the world keeps on turning
while my stomach is churning.
Am I some unholy relic,
who's terminally unique?
All these youth with pinched smiles
trudging through
road weary miles
I've  often remained silent
when I should speak.

Now that I'm older and paying less taxes
Here's my principle with interest
if it'll awaken the masses

I'm still a groovy old shrew.
With a surprise left or two
So consider giving me half of a chance

My only dilemma are delusions of grandeur
and these delusions keep shitting their pants
I'm not quite dead yet
nor ready to fold.
That's how it is to grow old...

Buddy  Bee Anthony

Re-edited 03/20/2023 @ 9:37 AM Pacific Standard Time

All published and editing rights reserved 'as is' by this author













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That's How It Is To Grow Old


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