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“The Wait”
He had already
waited
three hours
past
the time
she
said she’d be
there by
tonight
trying to convince
himself
it was no big
deal
but unable to
take his eyes
off the clock
staring at him
from a top of
the T.V.,
his first couple
of messages
were filled with
faked concern
for her well
being
but in truth
were just a
probe
to hear her
voice
and get an
idea
about how
tonight
was going to
play out
but she
never
answered her
phone,
he could
already see
the cracks
forming
on another
broken promise
to him
about the only
thing
she was consistent
with
in their relationship,
he left a few
more messages
as the hands
on the clock
continued to
turn
unable to hide
the desperation
in his voice
his anger
and harsh words
just a front
to cover up
the mounting
pain
she’s inflecting
on him
by ignoring
his calls,
she continues
not to answer
the phone
her prerecorded
voice mail
greets his calls
instead
talking to him
in a bouncy
perky
upbeat way
showing no
sense of urgency
to his pleas
for acknowledgment
which is just
pissing him
off
even more,
each time
having to listen
through its entirety
before getting a
chance
to leave her
his venomous
words
hoping they trigger
some kind of
a response from
her
but they don’t
they never do
she won’t have
to explain herself
if she never
answers her
phone,
the clock just
keeps getting
bigger
it’s eyes
following him
around
as he goes
from room to
room
trying to hide
from the presence
of time
and the ever
increasing anguish
its putting him
through
with every passing
minute
it releases from
it’s grip,
it was after
2am
when he left
his last rambling
hate filled
message
and almost 3am
when he got up
from his bed
and opened the
front door
for her
not saying a
word
just leaving the
door wide open
as he heads
back to his bed
unable to pretend
anymore
he doesn’t love
her
or that feeling
that he has
deep inside
of him
needing to have
her
pressed up against
him
so incredibility
tight
proving to him
she really is
here
with him now
it’s as if her
body
was feeding into
his very soul,
he watches her
silhouette
on the bedroom
wall
as her clothes
are mythically
stripped away,
that night
he took out
all his pent
up hate
and anger
as she lay
beneath him
each thrust
tricking him
into believing
he’s still in
control
of his life
but in reality
they only serve
to solidify
her hold on
him
and his heart
a fact he
fights hard
not to realize
and successfully
hides from
for the remainder
of the night,
knowing
in the morning
she’ll explain
away
all her indiscretions
never her fault
always just a
miscommunication
and he’ll pause
as he studies
the look on
her face
before finally
accepting her
explanation
the whole
episode
quickly forgotten
by both
only being
remembered
by him
the next time
he’s sitting in
front
of that same
truthfully speaking
clock
having as much
hatred
for the passing
time
as he does
for the situation
he put himself in…
Tom Allen…04-21-2018…
He had already
waited
three hours
past
the time
she
said she’d be
there by
tonight
trying to convince
himself
it was no big
deal
but unable to
take his eyes
off the clock
staring at him
from a top of
the T.V.,
his first couple
of messages
were filled with
faked concern
for her well
being
but in truth
were just a
probe
to hear her
voice
and get an
idea
about how
tonight
was going to
play out
but she
never
answered her
phone,
he could
already see
the cracks
forming
on another
broken promise
to him
about the only
thing
she was consistent
with
in their relationship,
he left a few
more messages
as the hands
on the clock
continued to
turn
unable to hide
the desperation
in his voice
his anger
and harsh words
just a front
to cover up
the mounting
pain
she’s inflecting
on him
by ignoring
his calls,
she continues
not to answer
the phone
her prerecorded
voice mail
greets his calls
instead
talking to him
in a bouncy
perky
upbeat way
showing no
sense of urgency
to his pleas
for acknowledgment
which is just
pissing him
off
even more,
each time
having to listen
through its entirety
before getting a
chance
to leave her
his venomous
words
hoping they trigger
some kind of
a response from
her
but they don’t
they never do
she won’t have
to explain herself
if she never
answers her
phone,
the clock just
keeps getting
bigger
it’s eyes
following him
around
as he goes
from room to
room
trying to hide
from the presence
of time
and the ever
increasing anguish
its putting him
through
with every passing
minute
it releases from
it’s grip,
it was after
2am
when he left
his last rambling
hate filled
message
and almost 3am
when he got up
from his bed
and opened the
front door
for her
not saying a
word
just leaving the
door wide open
as he heads
back to his bed
unable to pretend
anymore
he doesn’t love
her
or that feeling
that he has
deep inside
of him
needing to have
her
pressed up against
him
so incredibility
tight
proving to him
she really is
here
with him now
it’s as if her
body
was feeding into
his very soul,
he watches her
silhouette
on the bedroom
wall
as her clothes
are mythically
stripped away,
that night
he took out
all his pent
up hate
and anger
as she lay
beneath him
each thrust
tricking him
into believing
he’s still in
control
of his life
but in reality
they only serve
to solidify
her hold on
him
and his heart
a fact he
fights hard
not to realize
and successfully
hides from
for the remainder
of the night,
knowing
in the morning
she’ll explain
away
all her indiscretions
never her fault
always just a
miscommunication
and he’ll pause
as he studies
the look on
her face
before finally
accepting her
explanation
the whole
episode
quickly forgotten
by both
only being
remembered
by him
the next time
he’s sitting in
front
of that same
truthfully speaking
clock
having as much
hatred
for the passing
time
as he does
for the situation
he put himself in…
Tom Allen…04-21-2018…