I have had difficulty my whole life
Sadness, barriers, forks in the road
That you'll never understand
These who were there have my heart for all my life
They never judged me even when I was learning and I was angry
Even when I was grieving and isolating
Even when I was a whale it was my own insecurities or they loved being around me
I don't do cold I love affection and If I can't have you this life
Why would I want you the next life?
You turned away like I meant nothing
Like others were more beautiful and smelt of roses
I smell like a hustler and I'll sometimes smell of sweat
I'm a grinder I never asked nobody for nothing not even my ex
He gave me nothing, but a broken life
I rebuilt myself from the ashes he burned me with
Don't look at me thinking you even stand a chance
I need a man to always defend me and stand by my side
I want a builder so we can build together
I need a friend so we can always hang out and admire that company
I need the romance, the travel and intimacy
I want a responsible man who I can rely on
Not a petty idiot staying up late talking to his friends and family members and he can't even get up to work
You don't know what hurt I had my whole life
Don't cause me anymore pain that I deal with daily
I've enough stress and concerns just like everyone else
I tried to embrace you and I wasn't good enough then
Nor will I be now and not at all
When I am in your presence all I feel is your anxiety
Is this guilt, regret, remorse or all three?
I never held a grudge against you!
I got my own life to deal with you're of no concern to me
I let you go along with all the other social media bases you admire
They're somehow better to talk to and look at so why bother with me?
I'm just a leaf...
Fallen from tree and scattered to the ground...
You'll never know me
I'm a mystery
You'll just never know
Now go catch a social media star
I'm sure her life is interesting enough
It goes like this
Laughs, jokes, banter, drinks, bing, bang- boom the end
You either keep living like that forever or you change