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 A New Woman

You listened properly
You were the best
Nobody on this earth compares
The pain is so raw
I only wanted to hear your voice
Your nature is kind and sharing
Equal and fair
I can forgive them because my love is deep
But I'm sorry mum I can't forget the pain
Nobody is perfect during hardship
No matter what they said wrong or did it was forgiven
I even forgot and moved on for you
Now I can't I pray to be with you
Everyday I am striving to be the best version of myself
I just want to be in the birzaq with you
Nothing is worth this dunya anymore
Family, friends they all stand alone
It's time now I learned things I have to
It's true what you said that only I can help myself
Or otherwise be left out in the cold
I still get overwhelmed and blow my top sometimes
Then I'm okay for months
I'll learn
My heart is pure and I can't hate anyone
I can only love people
It hurts being on my own, but I guess I have to be so I can grieve properly
Not like with dad- 6 hours school, 2 hours TV and dinner, shower, then homework 2 hrs then more TV then brush teeth
It was a good routine but it wasn't helpful with grief but I guess you wanted us to focus on school not grief
I love you for this ❤️
For everything
I miss you making me laugh and cheering me up
I'm heart broken only you understood my intentions and forgave me Instantly
For this I pray you meet Mohammed because you deserve it
You haven't hurt me or punished me in anyway
UNLESS I was young and I didn't eat My vegetables then it was no dessert lol
You're special I still cry and I can't help it
I want your hug, your kiss
Your nagging
Just everything








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