Has he got a handle on it? Nope, not at all!
And over me bed there's a waterfall!
‘I don't understand it!' He said to me,
‘The pipes seem fine from what I can see!'
So he took up the floor in the flat upstairs,
And plodded on, like he had no cares!
‘But what about me bed?' I asked of him,
He said, ‘Well I don't know!' So I just can't win!
So he plodded on all flippin' day,
I asked what was up but he wouldn't say!
‘It should be ok now!' He said again!
Cor blimey I thought, he's a bloody pain!
He was upstairs and downstairs…all flippin' day!
‘I can't understand it!' Was all he could say!
‘But what about me bed? And what of me mat!'
‘You better fix it!' I said, ‘cos I'm not having that!'
So sweetly he smiles, as only he can,
Cos after all said and done, I am a fan!
Again I had to phone him up at 1am…
Said, ‘I've got a burst in me bedroom again!'
I was really crying! Me eyes were red!
What could I do? It's ruined me bed!
I asked, ‘cor blimey Andy, what's going on?'
'How is it going, is the job almost done!'
‘Mmmm,' he said, 'I haven't a clue what's wrong,'
‘I'm trying my best, that's why I'm taking so long!'
So on and on he toiled all day…
‘I've no idea!' Was all he could say!
Scratching his head, he looked at me…
I looked at the ceiling, where water marks I could see!
So I sat and pondered, and thought and thought,
But no solace to be found, and for resolve we sought!
So he's up there now, in a hell of a mess,
And all he can do is take a guess!
The floor is up in the kitchen above,
He's toiling away, and it's not through love!
My ceiling is next, he's ripping it down today!
‘Oh Andy!' I wailed, 'will it be okay?'
‘I'm not sure,' he said again!
That man truly is a flamin' pain!
And we're all shattered cos we had no sleep…
Well, they all did, but all I did was weep!
Couldn't sleep in me bed, it's still all wet,
Well let's face it, with water that's what we get!
But I have faith and he will succeed…
Cos if he doesn't another new bed I will need!
I need to go and rest me head…
But there's nowhere to sleep, it has to be said!
So next time the water falls like rain,
You can bet your life, I'll call me landlord again!
I have to say though he's one of the best,
And believe you me he's always put to the test!
So roll on resolve and a nice dry bed…
Cos I need me sleep, need to rest me head!
Has he got a handle on it? Who knows…?
Cos he hasn't a clue, it's all guess work I suppose!
So watch this space, and see the end outcome…
Cos I have to say, it's not any fun!
I need to have a sleep, and rest me weary head…
But I can't sleep in a flamin' wet bed!
I thought my Tigger had been a naughty cat!
And pee'd on me bed, I wasn't having that!
Poor little thing, it wasn't him at all…
He was in his bed in the kitchen, curled up in a ball.
So while everyone slumbered in their bed…
I had to stay up all night awake instead!
But no matter what and no matter how or when,
That leak will be fixed…and it better not burst again!
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