Hi Baby!
That's how he started
his goodbye letter to me.
Hi Baby! I smiled as I read,
could hear his voice, knew
with those two words
that we would be okay.
I was wrong.
Hi Baby! he wrote,
I feel like I have to
be with you, associate
you with my past,
am not ready for
a relationship.
It's not you,
it's me.
Everything
we have together
is a lie.
Was it a lie
when he told me,
I could marry you,
be with you for
the rest of my life.
Was it a lie when
he whispered that
he couldn't help
falling in love with me,
that if it weren't
for his boys, he would
move in with me
in a heartbeat?
When I tell people
that we broke up,
I tell them that
he loves me...
he just doesn't know it,
and they laugh and
shake their heads,
and then they always say,
"Lori, honey..."
in that pitiful, lingering,
questioning way...
and I stop listening.
Every time I read
"Hi Baby!",
I choke.
I want to ask him
to go on, finish
the letter...because
he can't mean
the words he wrote.
