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you don't need a face to see the light


you don't need a face to see the light
(and other perks of attempted suicide)




Loaded and lonely,
Alan pitched a rifle beneath his chin, fired,
missed his head    (How do you miss your friggin' head?)

and blew his face clean off.
It draped over the rifle
like a flesh tent,
a tapestry of scalp and cartilage.

Defiant and intact, his head
bobbed like a buoy
shiny, crimson and sticky
in a blood river.

Which prayers must he have uttered to a vengeful God?
What promises screamed?

Multiple surgeries, reattached remnants.
Scraps of face, pieced like a quilt.

Now, Alan looks like the ghost of
some Gary Oldman character
whose face was gnawed by a wild boar.

He collects disability and squeamish stares.
Works an odd job here and there.
Keeps to himself, mostly.

Occasionally though, he lands in a bar,
wearing a dog collar, throws his head back and gurgles at the moon.

Like a parlor trick,
I've seen Alan

stick a nail in his mouth
use his tongue like a grommet tool,
and shove the nail back out his nose orifice.

And yeah, he still drinks.
It's just his swallow that's changed.



Mary











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