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I Think I Do His Head In!


I think I do His head in ya know!
This very special God!
Cos I know that I can be a pain!
And He's still a very busy bod!
I know I have Him up the wall,
For there I am every flippin' night!
Shouting out in my darkened room!
And giving meself a fright!

‘Goooood!'  I shouted the other night!
‘Get yourself in this room!
Cos I'm feeling really nervous!
In the dismal light of the moon!'
I listened hard, I really did,
But I didn't hear no-one reply!
‘Oh God,' I said, ‘where are you!
Cos I think am gona cry!'

So I snuffled into my pillow,
Oh heck; I think it's fit for the bin!
Cos I always seem to cry on it!
I simply just can't win!
‘God, where are you?' I whispered,
Cos I was now so very upset!
And didn't have the strength to shout!
Cos me eyes were soaking wet!

‘Catherine, kid, are you ok?'
My God whispered in my ear!
‘Oh blimey mate!' I said in thanks!
‘It's about time you got here!'
‘What seems to be the problem kid?'
God whispered once again!
‘Oh flippin' heck God,' I said;
‘Am I driving you insane?'

‘Not at all Catherine!' He said;
‘And please don't get upset!
Cos you'll only get a headache,
And that will cause you to fret!
So then, what's the problem kid?
What's keeping you up at night?'
Well, I guess He knew there was summat up!
And that I'd had another fright!

‘I have a little problem again!'
I whispered through me tears!
‘And you know me my God, I worry,
And get riddled with all these fears!
Now you know the operations I've had,
And all the mess these years,
Well now I've got another one!
And it's causing me such fears!

So I have to go under the knife again!
And I am just about worried sick!
In fact, I think I need a bucket,
And I need it really quick!'
‘What's the matter Catherine?' He asked,
Once again in the dark of night;
‘Tell me what is wrong with you,
That causes you such fright!'

‘Well I don't need to go into detail God,
Cos you know everything about me!
So all I want to ask of you…
After this op, can you let me be?
Let me be able to move on in life,
And maybe get a fella who'll do…
Help with all the housework,
And maybe the cooking too!

Cos you know that I'm knackered,
So suffice to say, I need support!
And so here I am once more,
Asking for another avenue to be sought!
Now I'm really only joking,
Well, about the fella I am!
But not about cutting me some slack!
Or you're gona lose a fan!

And you know that I'm a man hater!
Well, of course you do! I said;
‘Cos after all I cried for ever…
And me eyes were permanent red!
So you can sack the fella part off!
I mean to say, I tell it true!
No way would I ever let a fella in!
And you know what I tell is true!

Cos I can't keep doing this health stuff,
Cos it's really wearing me out!
So please my God, can you at all,
Get rid of all my doubt!
And ease my plight a little bit,
Cos I really can't cope at all!
So then God, it's down to you!
Cos I guess this is your call!

But if you feel like helping me,
Feel free to ease my plight!
And then I may give you a rest,
From my chatter every night!'
‘Ok, ok!' He said to me,
‘I guess you've had your share!
Of all the sad and bad in life,
So I'll ease your mind, because I care!'

‘Well thank you very much, my God!'
I said with a fit of glee!
‘Cos now I can maybe sleep this night,
And anyway, now I can't see!
Cos it's really, really dark now God,
And the clocks went back this night!
So here I am once more…
Typing in the dull moonlight!













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