I write to my best in the middle of the night,
Especially when this pain is so out of sight!
I can't settle to sleep, for sleep wont come;
Oh woe is me; I will be awake to see the sun!
I will watch it rise, as I often do!
Sleep again evading me, I feel oh, so blue!
I lay in the darkened room, praying for sleep;
As daylight once again, into my room does creep!
I wear my neck brace, to ease this pain;
On my arm is another brace…it's damn insane!
A brace for my knees to help them be strong,
So I won't fall; cos I can't stand for long!
I can't have a brace for this knackered spine!
Cos it's twisted and bent, and far from fine!
I bend to the right; cos my spine is a mess;
But if I wasn't bent, you would never guess!
I hip hop when I walk, well, ok so I'm last!
Cos I can't walk for far, and I'm not that fast!
So I have to say in honesty, this is the truth!
I never had much good health, even in my youth!
So I have an electric power-chair to get me around!
And I have to say, it's pretty damn sound!
Cos it gets me round faster than fast!
And it never gets tired, it's made to last!
There is some compensation to being like me!
All knackered and in pain…but happy and free!
Cos though my pain is bad, and trust me true!
It really is all that, but you wouldn't have a clue!
But I guess at times like this when I'm really bad!
I let no-one see me! Am I really that sad?
Nah, I don't think so, cos they would only worry,
And get all upset and in a flurry!
So I hide away on bad times as I am right now,
Cos I have to admit it, I'm a stubborn cow!
Why worry them they get upset to see me in pain!
So when I am like this I wait till I'm better again!
Don't get me wrong, I'm in pain all the time every day!
But considering all that, I really do okay!
You see, when I say I'm in pain all of the time!
That's what I mean, but it's no good to whine!
Hmm, am I whining now? I guess that I am!
But hey, it's allowed, I'm my number 1 fan!
But I let it out in my writing, as of course I should do!
Hey, it helps me focus, and helps me get through!
Through the nights like now, when it's out of sight!
And unbearably so, when it's not alright!
But get through it I do, though I never know how!
Cos trust me, it's hard, just as it is now…
But I will fight it until the day that I die;
Meantime it's allowed, oh yes, I can cry!
Cos tears are the healer, well they are for me!
And at the end of the day, another morning I see!
And every day when I wake up in this awful pain!
I look to the heavens and thank my God again!
Thank Him that I see yet another amazing day!
Rather I be here in this pain; than not; I have to say!
So once again I say; ‘Thank you God for this new day!'
And as I lay in my bed, once more I will pray;
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