My Beliefs Sift through All That Discourages When I am Adjacent To Happiness
Middle America Somewhere Every sixty seconds
I got to get away I got to run for it
make an escape I'll take my chances
I understand the risks but I can't live like this
I can't be consumed anymore I can't trade my heart for words and
pay the full price when I took it at half off before, my bodies for sale and,
my souls half full and I want the better part of me to be safe from being wasted so
I'll give you what you want but never giving the best of me its not for you
It doesn't hurt no only numb from where you touched me
If I had to live with never being touched again by anyone just to be sure I was never
touched by you I'd have to sacrifice and be touched no more
I cry for the hand that waits to console me but I shake from the hand that lives to burn my
skin leaving your marks against my flesh I kiss the hurt and you see me weakened and
take advantage of that, all those times I cried from disgust, you prayed upon my sickness
the nausea of lust became my illness and there I go stepping outside my body I'm drifting again
As you blackened my eyes I'm seeing red I feel your fist in my dreams though I know I
won't wake up from this.
There is only God, "I see you" he says he knows of my trials
and is coming with a light to illuminate the darkness that wants badly for me to give in to it
The sirens are blaring but not enough to drown out the sounds of my baby screaming
down the hall I hear people talking over top of me but I can't see I'm so far gone
I hear them ripping him from me beating him off of me to stop the blows to my head. They are furious with him I sense their hate for him, but their hate is no match for his. He wants me dead before he leaves or he'll come back and try all over again. I'm slipping I'm floating I hear my son calling my name his voice cracks and the screams are from reality tearing at
his heart this is our family this is his Dad raging with bloody hands killing his Mommy.
Somebody hold my baby, God save me. I need to be here for him please somebody hold
my baby. Hold him till he doesn't remember this night, hold him till he doesn't ache from living and Hold him till he doesn't cry for my life. Somebody love him and love me for tonight.
I tried so many times to escape I was running from him but he killed me
I cry he's killing me
I was alive
I was alive
I'm dying
Six months go by.
I woke up in a hospital room to find my son sitting on my fathers lap
beside my bed.
Both sighing from relief ,crying to hear me speak trying to quiet me,
my little man smiling.
I hurt everywhere,I asked what happened I thought I was dead?
My son held my hand
So grown at five years of age
He spoke to me with a wisdom beyond his years "it was just a dream, "Tomorrow will come you'll see it'll be better
"We'll start all over again , the three of us, it’ll be okay".
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