Germany
was like heaven but you see where I am
now
it gets hotter than a hundred in the summer
with no clouds
...I've been dragged down
but at the same time
I've been dragging myself
for so long
to think I was someone special once upon a time
it's like
a seriously psychological delusion
&
the world doesn't mind
letting me know
I said to the butler here're the keys
then walked out with nothing
&
nothing is what I'll be
forced myself into slavery
What is this that I've done?
tried to go back home but now there is none
tried to reach you through prayer
tried to reach you through war
tried to reach you through self-destruction
(there's not enough wine)
found the silence I never wanted to find
the lost connection
but I am still here on the line
What is this that I've done?
What is this that I've done?
Is this what I thought I wanted sometime before now?
&
Is there any going back?
Or is this the meltdown I am not strong enough to hack?
Is this the world shifting it's pole(s) to bring life back?
Is this the way we are truly supposed to grow?
Does this ever end or is this the eternal bodybag
in which I shall stay?
