Shall I take the time to say goodbye or simply disappear
Into the tangled maelstrom of thoughts slowly fading away?
Even if I remember everything and everyone I held so dear,
The memories will only stay awhile...there will come a day....
A day when clouds are in my eyes and I dream cottony dreams;
Shapes and spaces shimmering, only vaguely known to me.
All my well woven mental tapestries unraveling at the seams,
Lost in the netherworld of what was, or that which is to be....
To be my old self again, ah, when all thoughts were sweet;
To speak in deep thought and rhyme of things that mattered,
But now shreds of memories lie torn and tattered at my feet,
And all knowledge that served me well, broken and scattered....
Scattered to the four winds that howl inside my fallow brain.
Permutations, primes, Descarte, Newton have all disappeared,
All my mental luggage being piled onto a slow moving train
Leaving the station in fits and starts toward all I have feared....
All I have ever feared is to lose the ability to reason for myself.
I once reveled in the thrill of learning and of knowing
It's a shame, I don't want to let dust gather on the shelf,
Even in the midst of being aware that everything is slowing.....
