Each breath of Life
I breathe brings me
Closer to my own
Death,
Not a terrifying
Concept,
But the embrace
Of an infinitely
Patient lover.
Three times
Has he kissed me,
Once as a babe,
Once as a child
We had a long embrace,
And last as a teen
We had a quick farewell
Until we meet again.
I know always
When my beloved
Has kissed another,
The reason is
No never mind,
Cancer,
Heart attack,
Car crash,
Suicide
Or Murder
Matter not.
Soon,
Days even
My love will
Claim them.
When a Soul's
Time is set to
Leave it is decided
Long before it arrives.
There may be a couple
Of options here
And there
Or now
And then
But when I tell
A woman who councils
The young
On Death & Dying
She asks me
A fated question
On Murder and Suicide.
My response was:
Souls make a contract
When one is murdered.
Suicide is a choice.
Simple words trigger
A cascade
A torrent of anger
A maelstrom of emotion
And repulsion.
There is understanding
Behind what I say
But no ability
To turn back
And explain the
Depths of what
I know behind
Over simplified words.
Earth words suck
And this is another great
Example of that.
Everything in her being
Screams “NO!”
I have screwed up
Again.
I have offended her.
The alternative
To my offer is that
Their deaths
Were meaningless…
That this beautifully
Orchestrated life was
Randomly
And senselessly
Ended.
No one wants to
Consider that the
Reason Judgment
Is left in God's Hands
Is because
Unconditional Love
Never takes offense
In the first place.
What is there to forgive
When there is nothing
To forgive?
But this is a perspective
Of the Divine
Not of Humanity
And it is painfully obvious
That this gentle soul
Who counsels
Those dealing
With such brutal
Endings
Is enraged
At such perspectives
And concepts.
The one who is harmed
By the hatred
Of brutality
Of murder
Is NOT the one
Who murdered
Another,
But the one
Who can't forgive.
It is a poison
That eats away
Like cancer
At its host.
Life and Death
Are graceful
Dance partners
Not opposing generals
On a battlefield.
There is also
A time and a place
For such things
And one cannot
Suggest forgiveness
To those who are
In the midst
Of such anguish
As grief
And the quagmire
Of its stages
To suggest
Forgiveness
And meaningful
Death,
That the Universe's
Clock on our life
Isn't “wrong”
When our hearts
Are in such pain
That it screams
“wrongness.”
When the Souls
Who walk this world
Are angels in disguise
And are needed elsewhere
They leave us.
