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I was wrong.

Closest I've been to you is passing you on the street somedays
Or driving down the main road and barely seeing your house
I messed up our lives.
Took our happiness for granted.
Our comfort.
Missing the fact that that was the only consistent thing.
Blinded by greed.
A stupid need.
To have space away from our space.
But what did I need that for?
When I said the grass wasn't greener I was referring to freedom.
I loathe this freedom.
I miss the freedom of expression that we shared.
I was ok to be strange.
Because we both were and there laid our unconditional love.
Which was the gateway to the realm we created.
The path was our colors.
And paradise. Comfort. Love. Joy. Security.
Was there on the wavelength we made.
Now it's darkness.
It's not just my brain that's sad.
My body is furious.
I am sad.
I'm alone without you.
I didn't leave to be with someone else.
I knew to be with anyone else was a nightmare.
See I tried that before.
No offense to the test.
But it's always been you I craved.
Always.
It's your energy.
How it connects with mine.
How raw and passionate we could be.
I would give my last breath to wash your dishes, run you a bath, set up a tv, put something together, move something,
I would give anything to replace what I've caused to happen inside of you with relief.
I would do anything to get one of those hugs I used to get when I had a bad day at my moms.
I wish I could be with you.
I wish I could help.
I wish I could help keep you close to your son.
I would do anything for you.
I ain't functioning very well these days.
But this is what I asked for.
This is what I forced you to do.
What I forced you to go through.
It's just not right what I did to you.


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I was wrong.