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Sorry doesn't fix it

I never wanted to start over.
But in my emotional decision making
I forced myself into this.
It's tedious.
Nerve wrecking.
Emotionally debilitating.
I'm trying.
All I had to do with her was try.
Put in the effort.
Love her.
Love my family.
Keep putting in the effort to help support them.
Everybody's separated now.
Well I don't know that for certain.
I just hope she's having an easier time.
I pray she recovers.
I think about her everyday.
Every second of every day.
I think about her baby just wanting to ride with me.
The boy.
I miss him.
His button up shirts and that smile.
I bet he's gotten so big.
I miss being there everyday with them.
I miss everything I ran away from.
I destroyed my home.
The temporary emotion....to relieve that pressure was not worth what I gave up.
Can't go back home after you volunteered yourself out of it.
I miss my home.
You have always been home for me.
Saying sorry doesn't fix it.
It's just saying sorry.

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Sorry doesn`t fix it